Flirtations! with Benjamin, the Flirt Coach

39. Breaking Cycles in Dating (and in life!) with Jessica Amos

In this episode of Flirtations, we're breaking cycles, y'all! Cuz you are what? A cycle breaker!
With our incredible guest for this conversation, mindfulness coach and TEDx speaker Jessica Amos, we’ll explore how to break free from three types of cycles that play out in our dating lives - and beyond.
First, we'll look at generational cycles, or the cycles that become familiar to us through our childhood. These cycles take hold because of how we are raised, they form by making observations of our surroundings growing up, and we can even inherit them! How do these cycles find their way into our dating lives and impact how we form relationships, how we attach, and how we love?
Also up for consideration are mindset cycles, or those thought patterns we get stuck in that can fuel self doubt and negative thinking. How do we develop these cycles and what can we do about it to have more mental and emotional liberation in our own minds?
Finally, we'll be getting into behavior cycles, or our patterns of action that sometimes have us make the same decisions that aren't the best for us, leading to repeat mistakes and "learning" the same lesson over and over. What can you do if you feel like you can't break free from yourself and your own behavior?
If you’ve ever felt stuck in a loop or struggled with patterns that seem impossible to break, I hope you'll stay right here as we learn how to embrace change, cultivate a more empowered version of ourselves - and break cycles!
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!
About our guest:  Jessica Amos is a certified mindfulness teacher, coach, two-time TEDx speaker, and the founder of Stay with Yourself. With over 1.2 million downloads and a community of 90,000 students, she blends personal storytelling with high-value courses on topics like Shadow Work, Inner Child Healing, and Compassionate Boundaries to create a safe, intimate space for healing. When she’s not writing, speaking, or working with clients, you can find her rocking out to Nirvana, taking obscenely long walks (is all day ever too long?) and planning her next escape from the internet. Learn more at StayWithYourself.com.
Get Jessica’s 10x Course Bundle ($49) - https://staywithyourself.circle.so/checkout/courses-bundle
Learn to Meditate in 8-Weeks with Jessica ($89) - https://staywithyourself.com/learntomeditate/
Join Jessica’s Intro to Inner Child Healing Workshop ($97) - https://www.autumnreeser.com/inner-child
About your host:  Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!
As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic, romantic, and with the self - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and deeper connections.
You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.
💗 Happy flirting!

38. Why F*ckboys are Boring and How to Not Chase in Dating with Ryan Sheldon

Today we're asking the question "what the heck is happening out there dating?!" with Ryan Sheldon, author of the new book, "F*ckboys are Boring:  A Gay Man's Guide to Dating (for everyone)." 
We'll take on the topic of the f*ckboy, how he dates, how you can spot him, and what you can do with your boundaries so you don't get emotionally caught up in their web! Unless you want to date the f*ckboy for some fun, in which case we have some tips for you, too!
Ryan also shares about his experiences dating both sexes, and what it was like coming out after dating women and making the transition to dating men, oye! We'll also talk about dating psychology here, getting into the mind of men and why they do what they do.
Intertwined in this conversation are tips and strategies for not chasing and allowing yourself to be calm, cool, and collected in the dating process - which worked for Ryan who is now dating someone that involves a meet cute moment in an Uber!
Finally, we conclude with Ryan's journey of body acceptance and how becoming comfortable in his own skin changed everything and lead to more fulfilling experiences and connections.
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!
About our guest:  Ryan Sheldon is a nationally recognized influencer, brawn model, and advocate for the LGBTQIA+ community. He has been featured on the TODAY Show and in publications like Psychology Today, Seventeen, and Teen Vogue, among others. In his latest book, FUCKBOYS ARE BORING: A Gay Man's Guide to Dating (for everyone), Ryan shares hilarious, heartbreaking, and candid stories from his personal journey through modern dating. Drawing from his own experiences, he offers a refreshingly honest and supportive guide for those seeking real connections in an era dominated by swipe culture.  You can follow Ryan on Instagram @RealRyanSheldon and TikTok @RealRyanSheldon. To get a copy of "Fuckboys are Boring," check out Amazon, Barnes & Nobles, or anywhere books are found!
About your host:  Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!
As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic, romantic, and with the self - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and deeper connections.
You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.
💗 Happy flirting!

Flirtini #2: Dating Tips if You're New to Dating or Unsure Where to Start

Maybe today you find yourself looking to date for the first or for the first time in a long time. Perhaps you're recently coming off an extended dating break or you're single again after a long term relationship. And you don't know where to start.
Flirty, I got you!
In this Flirtini, I've got a plethora of tips for where to even begin in dating!
First, I share five mindset practices that will help you immensely as you get back out there dating, but I'm not going to share them in the notes. You gotta listen! 😛
After that, I've got a few dating strategy starting points (for dating both on the apps and in person), and we'll wrap up with some ways you can stay focused, manage anxiety, and not go down the rabbit hole of chasing unavailable partners!
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!
About your host:  Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!
As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic and romantic connection - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and ultimately, a deeper connection with the self.
You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.
💗 Happy flirting!

37. The Black Cat/Golden Retriever Theory in Dating with Anna Kristina

Ooooo flirties ... today on Flirtations, we welcome Anna Kristina to the show, creator of the viral Black Cat/Golden Retriever theory in dating on Tik Tok and founder of the Black Cat Academy to share with us allll the details about this wildly popular - and transformational - approach to dating.
We'll learn from Anna what it means to be a black cat with her "3 principles of black cat energy" and how the dynamics between the black cat and golden retriever play out in early dating.
We'll also go into how to embody black cat energy, how you can transform from the golden retriever into the black cat, and talk about the duality of masculine/feminine energies.
Finally, we've got tips for queer daters out there about how these dynamics show up in same-sex relationships (for example) and how the straight guys out there can date the ultimate black cat.
When it comes down to it, Anna's mission is a personal one to empower women (and many gay men!) to embody their own power and accept nothing less than they deserve in dating - and in life.
I hope you'll join us for this incredible conversation as we tap into our inner black cat!
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!
About our guest:  Anna Kristina has gone viral many times over for her black cat/golden retriever theory in dating and overall straight-forward, empowering advice that is changing lives around the world. With an approach centered in knowing one's true worth and loving oneself wholeheartedly, Anna has created a vibrant community of women who do not chase men - but chase their own potential and dreams.
Anna is not only a dedicated mindset coach who is passionate about women's confidence and self love, but an entrepreneur and podcast host, as well. Her advice, honest approach, and transparency is valued by her black cat communitya and Anna further teaches her methodology on her Spotify exclusive podcast, "Be Smart, Play Dumb," now streaming!
You can learn more about Anna's work and watch all her videos on Tik Tok and Instagram, check out her courses and programs here, and stream the "Be Smart, Play Dumb" podcast on Spotify where each episode is dedicated to going in depth into the black cat/golden retriever theory.
About your host:  Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!
As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic and romantic connection - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and ultimately, a deeper connection with the self.
You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.
💗 Happy flirting!

36. The Confidence Episode! with Silky Nutmeg Ganache

Confidence is one of the most alluring, captivating, and powerful qualities a person can have ... yet it can also be one of the most elusive!
In the first official confidence! episode of Flirtations, we welcome superstar Silky Nutmeg Ganache on the show to inspire us to be our most authentic, confident selves!
Throughout this conversation, we answer questions like:
Where does confidence come from? Is it something we're born with? How do you build it, create it?
Can you feel confident in some areas of your life and not in others?
What if you don't feel confident in your dating life, how can you become more confident?
How do you show up with courage when you have fear and feelings of low self esteem?
What can you do in the face of rejection when you feel like your confidence has been knocked down?
You don't wanna miss the absolute nuggets of gold in this episode as we talk all things confidence!
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!
About our guest: Hailing from Moss Point, Mississippi, Silky Nutmeg Ganache has established her presence and legacy through the Emmy Award winning show RuPaul’s Drag Race. Appearing on three seasons - RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 11, RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars Season 6 - as well as Canada’s Drag Race, Canada VS the world - Silky has managed to be the finalist on 2 seasons. She currently holds the record of Most Lip Syncs won (9 Collectively).
Silky is also referred to as “The Reverend Doctor Silky Nutmeg Ganache,” due to her Masters Degree in Organizational Leadership and current pursuit of becoming a doctor in Philosophy. Education is the single thing in life that no one could ever take away from you. That was the message ingrained in Silky by her 86 year-old educator-grandmother. 
Finding inspiration for her name while watching The Food Network, Silky Nutmeg Ganache, describes herself as a southern bell who speaks the truth and will always lend a helping hand.  As a child, Silky was obsessed with the Food Network. While other children were tuned in to cartoons, Silky was tuned in to Emeril Lagasse instead.
Like many others, Silky sees the importance and responsibility of being a drag entertainer. When asked about her legacy, Silky shared, "I want everyone to know that as drag queens, we are greater than entertainers. We are doctors, lawyers, politicians, educators, etc. I hope to be the example through my accomplishments in education and through the many people I’ve enrolled and inspired to pursue higher education."
About your host:  Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!
As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic and romantic connection - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and ultimately, a deeper connection with the self.
You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.
💗 Happy flirting!

Flirtini #1: How to Know if They (and You!) Are Ready to Date

Welcome to the very first Flirtini on Flirtations!
Today, we're hopping in the emotional C.A.R. to answer the question, "How can I know if they are ready to date?"
We'll also using this tool to answer the same question for yourself - how to know if you're ready to date!
I love a good acronym and C.A.R. stands for capacity, availability, and readiness.
While I will always advocate for clarity through communication - simply asking them if they are ready - we all know dating isn't *always* this cut and dry.
So, fasten your seatbelts and let's hop in the C.A.R.! 
Vroom vroom!
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!
About your host:  Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!
As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic and romantic connection - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and ultimately, a deeper connection with the self.
You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.
💗 Happy flirting!

35. From First Impression to First Date with Matchmaker Daniel Cooley

On this episode of Flirtations, we're going from first impression to first date, y'all!
Let's set the scene. You walk into a party. A singles event. Networking get together. Really any social situation where you're looking to mix 'n mingle ... and maybe come away with a first date at the end of it all! This is where today's episode takes place!
As we answer questions like ...
How can you break the ice? Do first impressions really matter as much as we think?
What are some conversation tips? What if the person that caught your eye is always with other people, what are strategies to introduce yourself that seem natural?
How can you turn someone down that expresses interest in you, but you don't feel the same way?
What are some ways to manage social anxiety and feel more confident? 
What about asking for their number and setting up a date?
How about flirting tricks?!
All of this and MORE is waiting for you inside this episode as we welcome expert matchmaker Daniel Cooley on the show for this conversation!
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!
About our guest:  Daniel Cooley is a celebrity gay matchmaker, executive love recruiter, co-owner of Best Man Matchmaking for queer and gay men based in Los Angeles, CA. You can learn more about Daniel and ways to work with him on his website and Instagram!
Thirteen years ago, Daniel founded “The Thrive Tribe,” a nonprofit organization in West Hollywood dedicated to combating the stigma of HIV and AIDS while supporting Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer men in accessing PrEP.  
Known as “The Divine Connector,” Daniel transformed a small group into a vibrant community of thousands, helping many find meaningful gay relationships.  
With over a decade of experience as a massage therapist, Daniel primarily served GBTQ clients, forming deep connections and witnessing firsthand the loneliness and struggles some face in their search for love.  
In 2023, after connecting hundreds of gay men through his nonprofit and massage practice, Daniel met Anthony through retired Gay Matchmaker Mason Glen. Inspired by their successful collaborations, Daniel embraced the role of Matchmaker. With a unique blend of expertise in nonprofit work, real estate, entertainment, massage therapy, and spirituality, he is devoted to fostering conscious, queer connections for men ready to find their perfect match!
About your host:  Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!
As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic and romantic connection - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and ultimately, a deeper connection with the self.
You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.
💗 Happy flirting!
 

34. Royal Romance: Insights into the Dating Lives of European Royals with Amanda Matta

Today we're taking a peek behind the curtain into the dating lives of European royals!
For this conversation, we welcome Amanda Matta to the show, who has captivated over 2+ million followers on social media as an expert on the British crown and European royals!
We'll be flirting with royalty and having a lot of fun, asking questions like ... Why are royal relationships so intriguing? And inspiring?
How do the royals date? What might their Tinder or Hinge profiles say?
What are some little known stories of romance from inside Buckingham Palace?
Who was the greatest royal matchmaker?
Are there eligible royal bachelors available to date right now?!
You'll find the answers to all these questions and more inside this episode!
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!
About our guest:  Amanda Matta (@matta_of_fact) is TikTok's #1 royal commentator. Since 2021, she has provided historical context and contemporary insight into the never-ending royal news cycle. She is also the host and producer of the podcast Art of History. You can follow her on TikTok, Instagram, and subscribe to her royal newsletter, The Fascinator.
About your host:  Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!
As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic and romantic connection - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and ultimately, a deeper connection with the self.
You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.
💗 Happy flirting!

33. Dating Deliciously: How to Bring More Fun, Pleasure, and Desire into Dating with Torah Cents

Are you ready to date deliciously?!
On this episode, we welcome Torah Cents, who is going to give us all the details on how to infuse more fun, passion, pleasure, and desire into your dating life for an ultimately delicious experience!
We'll hear how to date deliciously on the apps and in person, creating engaging conversations that are sure to keep things interesting - and lead to to dates! Of course we've got some tips on how to flirt deliciously, too!
But that's not all. We'll be talking about how to savor confidence and feel more empowered and secure when meeting new people and going through the dating process. If you don't know what lover girl limits just yet  - and why you need them - you'll soon find out!
Finally, we've got wrapped up in this episode several mindset shifts to date with more presence, more ease, and more calm so you can make truly inspired connections, get out of your head, and enjoy just how delicious dating can be!
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!
About our guest:  TorahCents is known for her practical and unorthodox approach to dating for Women of Faith. She believes that dating should be delicious…and if it’s not…you’re doing it wrong.
She has helped thousands of women attract quality men, confidently date for the relationships they desire and has been fully launched on a mission to help women of faith create real options in men and  choose themselves first (instead of waiting for a man to choose them). 
🔥 She’s the Founder of Curved to Cuffed™️ - the #1 mentorship for successful women of faith who want to attract quality, marriage-minded men. ⁣
⁣💍 And the Creator of the Triple Threat Success Method™️ that has helped women go from no dates to a wedding date in less than a year. ⁣⁣
And when she’s not coaching you may see her releasing new episodes of her podcast, learning new tricks in her pole dancing class, spending time with her family and meeting up with her clients in different areas of the country. You can also follow Torah on Instagram!
About your host:  Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!
As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic and romantic connection - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and ultimately, a deeper connection with the self.
You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.
💗 Happy flirting!

32. Your Fall Dating Horoscope + Cuffing Season Dating Guide with Fernie!

Fernie is BACK on Flirtations to share with us in this episode our fall dating horoscope and dating guide for cuffing season! 
What is cuffing season? What do the stars hold for our dating lives these next few months?
What should we be focusing on out there dating this upcoming season?
Are there big themes the universe has in store for our love lives? How will this impact us out there dating and making connections?
How can we bring more fun, desire, and pleasure into our dating lives?
All of this and MORE is waiting for you in this episode!
Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Flirtations on your favorite podcast platform, and share this episode to spread BFE - big flirt energy, all over the world!
For more information on how to use astrology in your dating life and find out your "big three," check out episode 2 of Flirtations where we went into all of this!
About our guest:  Fernie Salinas (he/they) is a queer Latinx fortune telling witch from the Rio Grande Valley in Texas.  They are the owner and founder of Golden Mirror Fortunes, and they hope to be Your Favorite Fortune Teller! They grew up always knowing that magic was around us, as their great-grandfather and his son, their grand-uncle, were both curanderos (folk healers) in Rio Grande City, and it’s been such a delight to have Golden Mirror Fortunes carry on the legacy of healing and mysticism they instilled in him.
He’s also an educator — he went to Rice University, studied English and Art History, got their teacher’s certification, joined TFA, and have been a teacher and principal at various schools in the RGV.  He is currently an education consultant as well as running Golden Mirror Fortunes, their small fortune telling business.  He uses tarot and magic to help people heal and find their paths, all in service of improving their fortunes.  His deepest desire is to provide you with the light that you need to make your life a little more magical and glittery. Follow them on Instagram and let them be your favorite fortune teller!
About your host:  Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy, with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!
As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic and romantic connection - to take center stage and transform lives for greater healing and ultimately, a deeper connection with the self.
You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.
💗 Happy flirting!